I’ll confess, I’ve never been the best at setting goals or trying new things. Many times I set a goal of trying something new, do it for a couple of days, and then quit.
Usually, because I never gave myself an endpoint. But, one thing that has absolutely helped me in completing goals AND trying new things is to create monthly challenges for myself.
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I’ve had no spending on fast food, doing yoga daily, and reading 30 minutes each day. While I was not perfect by any means with these challenges they did help me stretch myself and I did more than I thought I could have.
Today, I want to invite you to a 30 days self-love challenge. Some of these may stretch you more than you are comfortable with and that’s okay! Skip it and come back when you’re ready. And by the way, you don’t have to do these in any particular order.
Don’t forget to bookmark this page so you can come back each day!
If you want to dive a bit deeper into your self-love journey, check out my FREE 7-day self-love course, where we’ll talk about self-love, self-care, self-worth, body image, boundary setting, and lots more. Click here to sign up!
Choose a few affirmations that you love to recite today.
Here are a few to get you started:
- I am worthy of everything that I desire
- My thoughts about myself are growing more positive every day
- There is nothing that I can’t do if I put my mind to it
Move your body in a way that makes you feel good.
This could be anything from gentle stretching to high energy dancing. What matters is that you are enjoying yourself and that it mays YOU feel good. I keep with the stretching and leave the dancing to someone else lol.
Disconnect from social media for a few hours (or a whole day if you can).
As much as we try to deny it, what we see on social media affects how we feel about ourselves. Whether it is seeing how much better someone else’s job is (OR SEEMS TO BE) or wishing we had bodies like models, social media can amplify everything that we dislike about ourselves and our lives.
Watch an empowering movie about another badass woman.
Create a playlist that inspires you to love yourself more.
I have a few different playlists that I like to use when I want to instill more self-love within me. If you need some ideas on what to put on your playlist, I have some recommendations here.
Write down everything you dislike about yourself AND then destroy it.
Burn it, rip it up, throw paint on it, get your cat to poop on it. You are more than those things.
Do something to make your home, office, bedroom, etc, a happier place for you to be in.
This could be anything from painting the walls, hanging up photos, or getting a hot pink rug (which I have in my office). You deserve to feel happy in YOUR space.
Start or end your day doing something that soothes you.
Some ways I start and end my day include journaling, reading, and petting my cat Chloe.
Buy yourself flowers (or other beautiful plants).
I first really learned about the beauty of having fresh flowers when I dated a florist. Since then, when I need a small pick me up, fresh flowers are one of my go-to’s. Succulents and Marimo moss balls (which I have!) count too.
Have a cup of tea, coffee, hot chocolate, or other hot/warm beverage.
My personal favorite is peach tea with honey and a little bit of lemon juice. I also love hot chocolate with marshmallows.
Have a silent retreat.
This could be for a few hours or the entire day. In this silent retreat, you want to remove yourself from all technology (so no phone or computer) and from people. Take your time to let yourself be alone with your thoughts.
Try a new therapeutic technique (or do an old one that works for you).
Read a few pages a book focused on self-love (or just a book that you enjoy.)
If you follow me on Instagram, you know that I’ve been reading A Woman’s Worth by Marianne Williamson (yes, the very same who was running for president). This book has been truly insightful and nourishing. If you’re looking for a book to read, I highly recommend it.
Another great recommendation is Radical Self-Love by Gala Darling.
Declutter a room or a space that you’ve been avoiding.
Decluttering not only frees up space in your home, but it frees up space in your mind. If you’re holding on to things from your past, you don’t have room for new things in the here and now (and in the future).
Text, call, or message someone that you love.
Our loved ones are often the best at reminding us about all of the things that are loveable AND they provide support when we’re feeling down.
Take a short walk and observe what’s going on around you. Or head to a park and just sit for a few minutes.
Buy yourself a journal and start a journaling practice.
Journaling can be a wonderful way to start learning more about yourself and building yourself up, especially if you start a gratitude journal. Click here to learn more about how to start a journaling practice.
Turn 5 negative thoughts into 5 positive ones.
Here’s an example of how to do this: That date didn’t go well. I’m so unloveable.
Instead: I’m grateful for the time that I spent learning about myself and what I want in a partner.
Break out your phone and take a selfie.
Take a selfie for your boyfriend, your girlfriend, your grandma, your cute neighbor up the street, or take it for yourself. Immortalize how beautiful you are. If you’re up to it, share it on Instagram and tag me (@learningtobefreeblog) so I can hype you up.
Take some time to meditate or focus on mindfulness.
This blog post has some great websites to find mindfulness exercises.
And this blog post has some great ideas for mindfulness and meditation products.
Collect some love notes and put them in your journal.
When I say love notes, I don’t mean the ones that a significant other has written, though they can be. These “love notes” can be things that anyone has said about you that make you smile. Scroll through your text messages, your purse, your Facebook page, etc, and pick out all of the wonderful things that people have said about you.
While this is an external validation and you don’t want to rely on that sometimes the people who love us see us better than we see ourselves.
Do a random act of kindness.
This could be anything from paying for someone’s coffee or leaving a “love note” for someone to find in a library book – I’ve actually had that happen before and I still have the note to this day. Spreading kindness and doing for others can do wonders for how you see yourself.
Do something that connects you to a happy childhood memory.
Growing up and realizing all of the hardships of the world can affect our self-esteem and outlook, so today, do something that connects you to a happy childhood memory. Swing at a local park, watch an old Disney movie, or blow bubbles. Whatever makes YOU happy.
Accept every compliment that you get today.
Today’s challenge may feel a little weird. I want you to accept every compliment that you get today, without playing it off. So if someone compliments your hair, no saying, “No, it looks gross today”. Smile and say, thank you.
Do something that you’re really good at.
Today’s challenge is to do something that you’re really good at. This can be anything at all…baking, making someone smile, painting, cleaning. Do it and give yourself a pat on the back for being amazing.
Write yourself a love letter.
What do you love about you? Your eyes, your smile, your compassion, your uncanny ability to sound like a dolphin? Whatever you love about you, write it down in a letter. After you’re done, save it and put it in your journal.
Touch yourself in a way that feels good.
Something that I realized recently (with the help of my healing circle facilitator) is that we don’t receive enough touch. That includes touching ourselves. So today, touch yourself in a way that feels good. This may be a simple squeeze or hug OR a full out masturbation session (which I am all for!).
Saying no is one way to establish good boundaries. Say no to something that you’ve been wanting to say no to. Reclaim your time and your peace of mind.
Take a luxurious bath or shower.
Look at yourself in the mirror and say, “I love you”.
This is the last item in the self-love challenge because it can be uncomfortable, but hopefully, after completing the last 29 days, you’ve grown to be more comfortable with yourself. So go ahead and say it. You’re ready <3
If you’re reading this, you completed the self-love challenge (or just scrolled all the way down). Nice work! If you’re interested in going a bit deeper and getting some personalized advice from me on your self-love journey, sign up here for my free email course on self-love.
Briana Hollis is a licensed social worker and self-care coach. She earned her Master of Science in Social Administration from Case Western Reserve University in 2014 and her Master of Education from Tiffin University in 2019. She has spent the last 5 years working in crisis intervention. Her passion for serving others is the heart of this site. She started Learning To Be Free to assist others in bringing freedom to their lives.
Briana is also the author of The Self-Care Journal for Young Adults.