I’ll confess, I’ve never been the best at setting goals or trying new things. Many times I set a goal of trying something new, do it for a couple of days, and then quit.
Why?
Usually, because I never gave myself an endpoint. But, one thing that has absolutely helped me in completing goals AND trying new things is to create monthly challenges for myself.
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I’ve had no spending on fast food, doing yoga daily, and reading 30 minutes each day. While I was not perfect by any means with these challenges they did help me stretch myself and I did more than I thought I could have.
Today, I want to invite you to a 30 days self-love challenge. Some of these may stretch you more than you are comfortable with and that’s okay! Skip it and come back when you’re ready. And by the way, you don’t have to do these in any particular order.
Don’t forget to bookmark this page so you can come back each day!
If you want to dive a bit deeper into your self-love journey, check out my FREE 7-day self-love course, where we’ll talk about self-love, self-care, self-worth, body image, boundary setting, and lots more. Click here to sign up!
Day 1
Choose a few affirmations that you love to recite today.
Here are a few to get you started:
- I am worthy of everything that I desire
- My thoughts about myself are growing more positive every day
- There is nothing that I can’t do if I put my mind to it
Day 2
Move your body in a way that makes you feel good.
This could be anything from gentle stretching to high energy dancing. What matters is that you are enjoying yourself and that it mays YOU feel good. I keep with the stretching and leave the dancing to someone else lol.
Day 3
Disconnect from social media for a few hours (or a whole day if you can).
As much as we try to deny it, what we see on social media affects how we feel about ourselves. Whether it is seeing how much better someone else’s job is (OR SEEMS TO BE) or wishing we had bodies like models, social media can amplify everything that we dislike about ourselves and our lives.
Take a break from social media for a bit and see how you feel. I recommend using an app like Stay Focused or Offtime to help achieve this.
Day 4
Watch an empowering movie about another badass woman.
Sometimes watching another woman step into her power gives us the courage to do the same. My recommendations? Moana and Frozen 🙂
Day 5
Create a playlist that inspires you to love yourself more.
I have a few different playlists that I like to use when I want to instill more self-love within me. If you need some ideas on what to put on your playlist, I have some recommendations here.
Day 6
Write down everything you dislike about yourself AND then destroy it.
Burn it, rip it up, throw paint on it, get your cat to poop on it. You are more than those things.
Day 7
Do something to make your home, office, bedroom, etc, a happier place for you to be in.
This could be anything from painting the walls, hanging up photos, or getting a hot pink rug (which I have in my office). You deserve to feel happy in YOUR space.
Day 8
Start or end your day doing something that soothes you.
Some ways I start and end my day include journaling, reading, and petting my cat Chloe.
Day 9
Buy yourself flowers (or other beautiful plants).
I first really learned about the beauty of having fresh flowers when I dated a florist. Since then, when I need a small pick me up, fresh flowers are one of my go-to’s. Succulents and Marimo moss balls (which I have!) count too.
Day 10
Have a cup of tea, coffee, hot chocolate, or other hot/warm beverage.
My personal favorite is peach tea with honey and a little bit of lemon juice. I also love hot chocolate with marshmallows.
Day 11
Have a silent retreat.
This could be for a few hours or the entire day. In this silent retreat, you want to remove yourself from all technology (so no phone or computer) and from people. Take your time to let yourself be alone with your thoughts.
Day 12
Try a new therapeutic technique (or do an old one that works for you).
One of the new things that I’ve tried in the past year is going to a gong meditation. But you could try anything from going to a salt cave, reiki, or scheduling an appointment with your therapist.
Day 13
Read a few pages a book focused on self-love (or just a book that you enjoy.)
If you follow me on Instagram, you know that I’ve been reading A Woman’s Worth by Marianne Williamson (yes, the very same who was running for president). This book has been truly insightful and nourishing. If you’re looking for a book to read, I highly recommend it.
Another great recommendation is Radical Self-Love by Gala Darling.
Day 14
Declutter a room or a space that you’ve been avoiding.
Decluttering not only frees up space in your home, but it frees up space in your mind. If you’re holding on to things from your past, you don’t have room for new things in the here and now (and in the future).
Day 15
Text, call, or message someone that you love.
Our loved ones are often the best at reminding us about all of the things that are loveable AND they provide support when we’re feeling down.
Day 16
Go outside.
Take a short walk and observe what’s going on around you. Or head to a park and just sit for a few minutes.
Day 17
Buy yourself a journal and start a journaling practice.
Journaling can be a wonderful way to start learning more about yourself and building yourself up, especially if you start a gratitude journal. Click here to learn more about how to start a journaling practice.
Day 18
Turn 5 negative thoughts into 5 positive ones.
Here’s an example of how to do this: That date didn’t go well. I’m so unloveable.
Instead: I’m grateful for the time that I spent learning about myself and what I want in a partner.
Day 19
Break out your phone and take a selfie.
Take a selfie for your boyfriend, your girlfriend, your grandma, your cute neighbor up the street, or take it for yourself. Immortalize how beautiful you are. If you’re up to it, share it on Instagram and tag me (@learningtobefreeblog) so I can hype you up.
Day 20
Take some time to meditate or focus on mindfulness.
This blog post has some great websites to find mindfulness exercises.
And this blog post has some great ideas for mindfulness and meditation products.
Day 21
Collect some love notes and put them in your journal.
When I say love notes, I don’t mean the ones that a significant other has written, though they can be. These “love notes” can be things that anyone has said about you that make you smile. Scroll through your text messages, your purse, your Facebook page, etc, and pick out all of the wonderful things that people have said about you.
While this is an external validation and you don’t want to rely on that sometimes the people who love us see us better than we see ourselves.
Day 22
Do a random act of kindness.
This could be anything from paying for someone’s coffee or leaving a “love note” for someone to find in a library book – I’ve actually had that happen before and I still have the note to this day. Spreading kindness and doing for others can do wonders for how you see yourself.
Day 23
Do something that connects you to a happy childhood memory.
Growing up and realizing all of the hardships of the world can affect our self-esteem and outlook, so today, do something that connects you to a happy childhood memory. Swing at a local park, watch an old Disney movie, or blow bubbles. Whatever makes YOU happy.
Day 24
Accept every compliment that you get today.
Today’s challenge may feel a little weird. I want you to accept every compliment that you get today, without playing it off. So if someone compliments your hair, no saying, “No, it looks gross today”. Smile and say, thank you.
Day 25
Do something that you’re really good at.
Today’s challenge is to do something that you’re really good at. This can be anything at all…baking, making someone smile, painting, cleaning. Do it and give yourself a pat on the back for being amazing.
Day 26
Write yourself a love letter.
What do you love about you? Your eyes, your smile, your compassion, your uncanny ability to sound like a dolphin? Whatever you love about you, write it down in a letter. After you’re done, save it and put it in your journal.
Day 27
Touch yourself in a way that feels good.
Something that I realized recently (with the help of my healing circle facilitator) is that we don’t receive enough touch. That includes touching ourselves. So today, touch yourself in a way that feels good. This may be a simple squeeze or hug OR a full out masturbation session (which I am all for!).
Day 28
Say no.
Saying no is one way to establish good boundaries. Say no to something that you’ve been wanting to say no to. Reclaim your time and your peace of mind.
Day 29
Take a luxurious bath or shower.
I prefer taking showers to when I do take a bath it’s an event. I light candles, put on music, and throw in a bath bomb. If you’re not the bath type, grab a shower steamer instead of a bath bomb.
Day 30
Look at yourself in the mirror and say, “I love you”.
This is the last item in the self-love challenge because it can be uncomfortable, but hopefully, after completing the last 29 days, you’ve grown to be more comfortable with yourself. So go ahead and say it. You’re ready <3
If you’re reading this, you completed the self-love challenge (or just scrolled all the way down). Nice work! If you’re interested in going a bit deeper and getting some personalized advice from me on your self-love journey, sign up here for my free email course on self-love.
Briana Hollis is a licensed social worker and self-care coach. She earned her Master of Science in Social Administration from Case Western Reserve University in 2014 and her Master of Education from Tiffin University in 2019. She has spent the last 5 years working in crisis intervention. Â Her passion for serving others is the heart of this site. She started Learning To Be Free to assist others in bringing freedom to their lives.
Briana is also the author of The Self-Care Journal for Young Adults.
I loved everything you have said in your post and more importantly the way you have said it. The tone in your writing is both calming and encouraging, perfect for a post on self-love. Kudos!!
I love this! Great suggestions for being kind to yourself and others, very motivating. Thanks for sharing!
Can’t wait to start!
This is so valuable! I think it’s so important especially during this time to make sure we check in with ourselves. These daily tips are amazing.
We live in a world where people find love in the validation of others.. self love is soooooooo necessary and so important.
This was a great read and timely, thanks for sharing
These are some very interesting suggestions. Great idea for coming up with 30-day challenges for yourself!